Role of parents

In the present scenario, parents are very much puzzled and confused and probably feel helpless for the education and career of their child. Of-course this is a matter of concern for most of us and it is quite natural cause of worry for the parents. Parents from the very beginning, start putting lot of pressure on their child for text book studies, extracurricular activities and keep them engaged beyond the child’s natural capacity. The natural growth of the child suffers and by the time they realize, it’s too late because the psychology of the child has already taken shape by this time.

Since this is a unique modern age anxiety the parents should find out unique solutions by themselves. In the current nuclear family society, the husband and wife both are in professional world, they themselves are tired of coping up with various tasks and its difficult for them to concentrate on the growth of their children due to lack of personal attention. Moreover, the joint family concept is slowly fading away. The shelter of grandparents is also not available in most of the families. The situation is very complex which basically is the reason the parents are equally perplexed. For meeting the family needs, husband and wife both work in the present society scenario. It’s not only required for meeting the financial goal but also to have social security. But it is utmost necessary to draw a balance to meet the need of the family and to nurture the child.

By my own experience, right from the beginning, the child needs care and love and along with that, a small task also needs to be assigned to the child and playfully he or she has to develop interest in some fields. At that stage itself, parents can start visualizing and analyzing the areas of interest in which their child is interested. I personally feel for each and every normal child, the intelligence level is almost same but the difference is only in the skill and likings. Some children are fast thinkers, some are methodical, some are good at expression, some are practical, etc. But, this is a very nascent stage and we should not worry at that moment but start watching the child’s growth and his/her area of interests.

A time comes when they start attending nursery and during their primary schooling, their performance in every subject is keenly observed by teacher and parents. Now, our job is to identify the areas of interest and we must start noticing the area where the child is actually taking keen interest.  If you minutely observe, at primary or even secondary schooling years, there are children who give more time in some particular subjects. For eg, some children devote maximum time to Mathematics while others are more interested in sketches and drawings; some are more interested in social studies while others are more curious about science - how and when, etc. It’s thus simple to understand the area of interest displayed by the child.

Here comes the major role of parents. We, as parents try to push and impose our areas of interest on the child. If the child is not very keen in Mathematics but prefer drawing, still we keep imposing our wish on him/her. I don’t say that he/she should not study Mathematics but at this stage, focus should be to encourage their interest and simultaneously they should be taught other subjects too, to make their concepts clear about the subject.

I have come across many children who are not at all interested in Mathematics and Science. But when the basic concepts and logics are made clear to them, the pattern and area of interest changes. Children mostly avoid studying those subjects which they feel boring or when the concept of the subject is not clear to them.

I would cite an example here which happens to be associated with me only as a teacher. One of my students was very much confused and disturbed since she used to score very poor marks in Physics in class 10th. She was deciding to opt for arts field from higher secondary though she used to score very good marks in other subjects including mathematics. Incidentally, her mother approached me and after discussion, I decided to guide her at a stage when the board exam was just 2 months away.  I had to start teaching her the chapters of class IX Physics though she was in 10th standard to make her concepts and basic strong in the Subject of Physics. Slowly she started picking up the subject and started solving difficult problems of class 10th. And to their parents surprise, she scored 92/100 marks in Board Exams.  And now she is studying Science subjects with more interests.  Since her concept of Physics were not clear in lower classes, and her doubts were not addressed by her teachers, therefore she had developed a kind of fear and she started hating the subject.

I shared this incident just to make to clarify that we have to play our part as a parent and identify the reason behind the student’s complacence towards any particular subject. In fact, just do not wait on the subject teacher alone for the feedback since teacher has to handle so many students together, rather, as a parent, it’s our duty first to see these early changes.

As a parent, we must understand one thing clearly, that child can perform in his/her area of interest better. It’s our duty to see that he is always happy in his life.  Our job is to identify the area of interest which will keep the child happy forever and give them a clear direction. We must see that our child grows as a good human being and that comes from family values and culture, behavior within family members and siblings.

Today, there are many avenues and openings for the grownup students. Lot of professions opened up post 1990; let it be Engineering, Medical, Journalism, Accountancy, Modeling, fashion designing, IT, Legal advisory or even small entrepreneurship to establish a business as start ups. We must visualize the era immediately after independence and till mid-90s, during which very limited avenues were available for the students. Very few professional colleges/universities were available. Though few Engineering and Medical Colleges and financial institutes were available and getting admission in those colleges was quite difficult for average students. Today, after opening up of the economy and business markets, tremendous avenues and opportunities are available. Therefore today, students have enough opportunities.  I say this because at the early stages of schooling of a child, the parents should not orient themselves towards a specific professional aspiration for the child but impart them overall good education, give them opportunity for skill developments and give them freedom to think and give them choice for their field of growth. We as a parent need to guide and support them to achieve their goals.


Thanks for your reading. 


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